Somewhere in March, I let stress take over and I checked out.
I’ve been checked out for about 6 weeks or more and I’ve learned stress can reek havoc in that amount of time. The kicker is, I started out telling myself it was "me time". But……Ooooo….was I lying to myself.
Work got stressful, finances tight, my daughter was in a rush to visit and choose a college, daughters were fighting, and our normal go, go, go, go was heavy. I couldn’t fall asleep. I was exhausted, emotionally and physically. I did the minimum in the evenings and binge watched TV when I couldn’t fall asleep. We ate rushed meals out, my water intake went down and I gained weight. Next, my mood went low along with my motivation and energy.
And then in April, I started another new book and realized I was setting the foundation for depression to make its way back in. Now that Mother’s Day has passed, part of me wonders if part of the stress was subconscious grief as we were approaching mother’s day. Either way, about 1 to 2 weeks ago, I had asked myself, “when was the last time I felt like this?” And the answer was easy. "After my mom died.”
I’m thankful, I asked myself that question. My realization has been the motivation I needed to do a few things different and get on a better path. I started with my emotional oil regimen and talking with my sisters. Last week I went live in our Facebook group, Joy for Everyday Women, talking about some of the reasons why I had checked out and shared the names of a couple books I’ve read this year. I posted in our members only group, Bloom, that I’m ready to revise and commit to new wellness goals.
It’s time to check back in! I think I have a new theme song too. Michael Buble’s Feeling Good has been ringing in my ears. I'm back to real self-care and my mood is lifting just in time for the festivities of prom and graduation for my oldest girls.
I made appointments with my counselor and I meet with a functional medical doctor this week. I’m looking forward to working with these wellness partners to help me set goals, to hold me accountable, and help me see what I can’t for myself.
Joysisters, it’s time for some self reflection. Are you checked out? Have you let stress reek havoc? When was the last time you felt this way? What are you going to do different today. Let’s start a conversation.
Feeling like you are living on autopilot? Check out my 3 tips to stop living on autopilot HERE. Spring has sprung. There is no time like the present to break out of the mundane!
We’ve entered the season of Lent on the Christian. calendar. It's a time where people give something up, their vices, and fast from it to turn their attention towards a closer relationship with God.
This year, I'm fasting from my scarcity mindset. I know that our creator provides everything we need for an abundant life to sustain ourselves in joy and purpose. I also know that my own thoughts and distance from God can squander it.
Do you know what a scarcity mindset is is?
It might sound familiar if you’ve ever read 7 Habits of Highly Successful People by Steven Covey.
Scarcity mindset is idea or worldview that opportunities, resources, and successes are finite. As a result people are tight fisted and guarded. I heard someone use the analogy of a pie. People with scarcity mindset view opportunities and resources like a pie. When some one takes a piece it leaves less for the rest of us.
A scarcity mindset grows from the feeling that there will never be enough. People with a scarcity mindset are hyper aware of the unfulfilled areas of their lives. This is a breading ground for unproductive and self-defeating thoughts,
Scarcity mindset holds us back. And so we want to move toward an abundance mindset. This is the idea that there will never be a shortage of opportunities and successes or of ways to accomplish your goals. Stephen Covey says abundance mindset “flows out of a deep inner sense of personal worth and security.” It is the knowledge of know there is plenty for everyone. Abundance mindset feels safe and joyful.
If scarcity mindset holds us back then an abundant mindset will propel us forward.
What we focus on grows. If you want an abundance mindset you need to focus on it. Some things that can help shift your mindset to an abundance mindset is to (1) recognize your thoughts for what they are and then flip the script.
I love Disney World so let’s use that as an example. If you see a a friend’s post about their trip to Disney and you think, “I’ll never get to go to Disney”, well then you won’t. But if you think, “I’ll be riding on that Peter Pan ride in no time at all”, then you will start to believe it and work towards it. Be present with your thoughts so that you can identify the thoughts that are holding you back and rephrase them. Then say the new phrase out loud (or in your head if it makes you sound weird in present company).
Next, (2)practice gratitude. Practicing gratitude for things in your life brings attention to the good and positive and shows you that there is already some abundance in your life. Designate a journal and a time to do this each day. Then periodically go back and read what you’ve given thanks for.
We all desire abundant joy! If we work on our abundance mindset it will help.
We have an Abundance challenge going on in our Joy for Everyday Women Facebook Group. And that challenge is to work on building an abundance mindset through the month of March. There is a post that goes up each day. The first few explain the process and then starting March 5th there are daily affirmations and steps to follow to focus on building that abundance mindset.
The month is going to be broken up into focusing on bringing abundance mindset to 4 categories: Confidence and Mindfulness, Health, Relationships and Finances.
So I'll fast from my scarcity mindset, work to build up an abundance mindset, and I will lean on God to help me. Here is my 40 day commitment. I will work everyday to identify thoughts that don't support an abundance mindset and rephrase them in a way that does. I will use aromatherapy and a gratitude journal as tools to support this journey.
Focusing on an abundant mindset in these areas will help us to grow in each area. When we grow in each area we open up to more abundant peace and joy. As the Dalai Lama says, "the source of happiness is within us."
